Voila! Sophie, your room is done! I hope you appreciate all the hard work and toil it took to get this lovely little nursery ready for your arrival. When I told my mom that the colors were black, green, pink, white and red (and a little bit of blue), she looked at me like was crazy. Well, who's crazy now?!?! Hahahahahahahah... whoopy! Yankees suck!
We saw "Knocked Up" today, and it hit a little close to home, and not just because there was a lot of swearing and too little nudity. That movie got me thinking that I am extremely honored to be married to Brittany and to be the father of our little Sophie (almost 100% certain now -- mailman discovered to be a eunuch; UPS guy unlikely due to creepy fondness for Merlot). Brittany will be one talented mommy, by the way. She will be a total MILF* and fortunately I'm a total MILF Hunter.*
Life rules right now. I'm so proud of our little family and I am super psyched to be a dad. This is the best thing I've ever been a part of! And I was in the boy scouts, dude. I learned how to tie a double post hitch overhand square knot and I once blew up a squirrel with a shotgun! And this is so much better than that! This fatherhood thing is the merit badge of all merit badges -- the "Fertility Merit Badge" (picture a sperm saluting the American flag).
OMG, Brittany is getting huge (no offense, but jeeeezum dude), but she is still funny as crap. We walked by the "Christian Science Reading Room" today and she said, "Excuse me, can you direct me to the REAL science reading room?" Pretty sharp for a pregnant lady!
btw, the green color of the walls in the nursery is called "Christopher Robin Swing." I was not aware that Mr. Robin was a swinger, but what do you expect from someone so obsessed with poo.
* By "MILF" I of course mean "[M]other [I] think will be a great parent and I'm just g[L]ad to be a part o[F] this adventure with her" ... Who wouldn't "hunt" for that?!?
Goodbye for now kids. Next week I will try to be less crude.
I will probably fail.
2 comments:
Even though you were trying desperately to be manly and crude, I saw a hint of sensitivity in there Natey about being a daddy! It's fun every now and then to hear the sweet side of the Moose Management. The room is DARLING! I'm psyched to see it in real life...get scared Nate...you're going to be challenged to a diaper-changing-contest...
Nate, I really love to know how much you love my sister. You don't know how happy that makes me. I can't wait to see what a rockin dad you're going to be. I have no doubts that you'll be awesome. Look at me all sentimental. What a rarity.
I'm so unbelievably stoked for you guys. I love you and can't wait to meet your little Republican.
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